Eight Reasons Why You Should Not Consider a Move to Nyack

Dated: August 4 2019

Views: 194

Nyack is really a horrible place to live.  And as a real estate broker and leader in the local community, I believe it's my duty to give the public the right impression of this disgusting locale.  With that said, following (in no particular order) is my list of 8 reasons why no one should ever consider a move to the village.

1.  You are right on the Hudson River.  You are totally going to hate the river views.  As we know, River views are just horrible for calming the soul.  Don't walk down to the River Walk at Memorial Park.  The Beautiful Views are bound to just set you off!  But if you really want to be annoyed, go for an afternoon cruise via the Nyack Boat Charter.  The fresh air and watching the way the sun makes the waves shimmer... Ugh!  It's not to be experienced.

2.  There are Way Too Many Restaurants to Choose From. No matter what cuisine you're trying to avoid, you'll find it in Nyack.  With the varying options for food and fare, Nyack is just horrible for your waistline!  You can take in calories at almost every turn!  And it's not just limited to food, no!  Nyack has some of the most ridiculous sweets imaginable.  Dinner and dessert at Hudson House, Desserts are Didier Dumas, Chocolaterie European Chocolate Shoppe... Forget about it!

3.  With all the Various Shops and Boutiques, You're Bound to Go Broke.  Clothing, Furniture, Antiques, Cheese, Glasses... You name it!  You can find it in Nyack... and lose track of what's in your wallet at the same time.  You can literally shop all day going from Main Street to Broadway... and don't forget the side streets like South Franklin.  Damaging I tell you! 

4.  Living in Nyack Promotes a Healthier Lifestyle.  I don't know about you, but it's totally one of those things I'm avoiding.  Walking, Biking, Biking...Biking.  Ugh!  It's horrible!  Especially biking up to Hook Mountain/Nyack Beach State Park.  Plus you get more of that horrible Hudson River.  Enough Already!  Oh!  And did I mention yoga?!  Namaste at every freakin' turn!  Hot Yoga, Aerial Yoga, Vinyasa... That on top of Boot Camp and Crossfit, Nyack is to be avoided at all costs.

5.  Nyackers tend to be BIG on community and making everyone feel welcomed and included.  You can't walk down the Main Street without someone greeting you with a smile.  Why is everyone in Nyack so happy?  And stick around long enough, you'll think you're in an episode of "Cheers", where everybody knows your name.  It really is terrible I tell you!

6.  How about those weekend street fairs and the Thursday Farmers' Market?  There is always something going on in Nyack.  And soon there will be that Annual Art Walk everyone is talking about.  Yes, more walking, shopping and now toss in visual stimulation.  Who needs it?  There are galleries galore and now even a designated historic museum, The Hopper House, with it's Hopperesque quaintness and it's beautiful garden.  It's just to much to take.

7.  Aside from visual arts, there also music and dancing.  You've got Maureen's Jazz Cellar and Live music and fattening Mexican food and an outrageous bar at Casa.  I really hate their monthly drink and drums meet up.  It is horrible how much this event pulls me in and make me dance.  Dont' go! If you do, you're bound to come back and possibly get sucked into dancing.  

8.  Another pocket killer are all the places for pampering.  Who wants to feel pretty? You have hair salons,  nail salons, eyelash extensions, massages!  There are even several boutique barbershops for men!  Enough Already!!!

In my assessment, Nyack may just make you live longer.  And it's super close to NYC and Tarrytown is just over the bridge.  

I hope my little pointers have given you a real look at what you're in for should you ever consider moving to Nyack.  If you are interested in a personal tour of the "why nots" and don't live in the area (as if my list above wasn't enough), Nyack now also has a boutique hotel, Time Nyack.  It's super uncool.  Book a room there and give R2M Realty a Call.  My team is bound to convince you if I haven't already.

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Kenyatta Jones-Arietta

Originally from the Motor City, this real estate maven has taken East Coast by storm! Kenyatta moved to NYC in the early 90's and met and married her husband, Rudy Arietta, who's roots are also from M....

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